More golf funnies!

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer.

Golf – You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins, on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.

Golf is harder than baseball. In Golf, you have to play your foul balls.

If you find you do not mind playing Golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here’s a valuable tip …your life is in trouble.

Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.

A ‘gimme‘ can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers …neither of whom can putt very well.

An interesting thing about Golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.

Golf‘s a hard game to figure. One day you’ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and for no reason at all you really stink.

If your best shots are the practice swing and the ‘gimme putt’, you might wish to reconsider this game.

Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.

Golf is like marriage, if you take yourself too seriously it won’t work, and both are expensive.

The best wood in most amateurs’ bags is the pencil.

golf

 Why Golf Is Better Than Sex…

#10… A below par performance is considered damn good.

#09… You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers.
#08… It’s much easier to find the sweet spot.
#07… Foursomes are encouraged.
#06… You can still make money doing it as a senior.
#05… Three times a day is possible.
#04… Your partner doesn’t hire a lawyer if you play with someone else.
#03… If you live in Florida , you can do it almost every day.
#02… You don’t have to cuddle with your partner when you’re finished.
And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex…..
#01… When your equipment gets old you can replace it.

 

Chiangmai Golf Festival 2016 May – June 2016

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list Green Package note Contact
1 Summit Green Valley Chiang Mai Country Club. 1000 0 5329 82222-3
2 The Royal Chaing Mai Golf Resort  – 1200 Green fee + Caddie 0 5384 9301-5
3 Alpine Golf Resort Chiang Mai 1200  –  – 0 5388 0888
4 Chiang Mai Highlands Golf and Spa Resort. 1200  –  – 0 5326 1354-9
5 Chiang Mai Inthanon Golf and Natural Resort.  – 1200 Green fee + Caddie + Cart 0 5326 7115-6
6 Maejo Golf Resort & Spa 1000 0 5335 4431-2
7 North Hill Golf Club   – 1200 Green fee + Caddie 0 5390 8999
8 Stardome Golf Club  – 1200 Green fee + Caddie + Cart
9 Gassan Khuntan Golf & Resort  – 1200 Green fee + Caddie + Cart 0 5350 7006-9
10 Gassan Legacy Golf Club  – 1200 Green fee + Cart 0 5392 1815

Changes in the rules of golf

 Changes in the rules of golf

The 2016 Rules of Golf changes have been revealed by the R&A and USGA, and include a number of alterations.

The 2016 Rules of Golf changes take effect on January 1st 2016, and come after a four-year review cycle and a collaborative effort between The R&A and the USGA. The new updates also come after CONGU announced plans to change the way handicaps are calculated, making it a busy few months for golf’s ruling bodies.

The most significant 2016 Rules of Golf changes include:

If your ball moves at address there is no longer an automatic penalty
Rule 18-2b (Ball Moving after Address) has been withdrawn. This means that if a ball at rest moves after you address it, you are no longer automatically deemed to have caused the ball to move. A one-stroke penalty under Rule 18-2 will still be applied only when the facts show that the player has caused the ball to move.

GM verdict: This is a great common sense move. If you’ve done nothing to cause your ball to move it seems unfair to be penalised.

No longer an automatic DQ for submitting an incorrect card
A new exception has been introduced to Rule 6-6d (Wrong Score for Hole) to provide that a player is not disqualified for returning a lower score for a hole than actually taken as a result of failing to include penalty strokes that the player did not know were incurred before returning their card. Instead, the player incurs the penalty under the Rule that was breached and must add an additional penalty of two strokes for the scorecard error. In all other cases in which a player returns a score for any hole lower than actually taken, the penalty will continue to be disqualification.

David Rickman of the R&A explains why they changed the Rules of Golf

GM verdict: This has been introduced after a few high profile incidents of players signing score without knowing they’d incurred a penalty. Possibly one for the Tour pros!

Modification of penalty for use of artificial devices or equipment
The penalty for a player’s first breach of Rule 14-3 (Artificial Devices, Unusual Equipment and Abnormal Use of Equipment) during the round has been reduced from disqualification to loss of hole in match play or two strokes in stroke play. The penalty for any subsequent breach of Rule 14-3 will continue to be disqualification.


Prohibition on anchoring
As announced in May 2013, the new Rule 14-1b (Anchoring the Club) prohibits anchoring the club either “directly” or by use of an “anchor point” in making a stroke. The penalty is loss of hole in match play or two strokes in stroke play.

Discussing the changes, David Rickman, executive director Rules and Equipment Standards at The R&A, told GM: “We continually look at ways we can improve and clarify the Rules of Golf. The R&A and the USGA collaborate closely and we consult with our respective national and international advisory members to produce a code of Rules that is relevant to all golfers around the world.”

Printed copies of the new Rules of Golf are now available from the USGA and The R&A. More detailed information on the 2016 Rules of Golf changes and the complete Rules of Golf can also be found at randa.org.

 

North Hill – Driving Range

North Hill – Driving Range

North Hill, nice driving range with comfy chairs ,couches to relax between shots.

40 ball tray for 35 baht, 3 for 100 baht.

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Early morning not the best time to go as the range faces directly in to the sun until around 11 am Will not be pleasant in the hot season, the other downside is they play loud music for some strange reason!

 

 

 

The North Hill course itself was almost deserted, probably because the green fee is 1500 baht for Thai residents, 4 times the price of the nearby Hangdong  golf course which is currently very busy but suffering from complete lack of control.

High Season Prices – Thai Residents

High Season Prices – Thai Residents

Alpine 

 THB3350 Green Fee,Caddy Fee,Golf Cart.

The ex home of The Chiang Mai Golf Classic

(Exceedingly poor value)

Gassan Legacy ( Formerly Lake City)

Green Fee THB1500,Caddy FeeTHB300,Golf Cart THB600

1st November to 31st March 2016 

Gold Canyon

GreenFee,Caddy Fee (Walking) THB

Green Fee, Caddy Fee,Cart: THB

Green Valley 

Green Fee:THB  Caddy Fee: THB Golf Cart:THB

Highland

Green Fee:THB1900, Caddy Fee:THB350,GolfCart:THB700

Very Poor Value

Inthanon

Daily THB1000 Green fee Golf Cart(Share) Caddy Fee

Walking: Creen Fee + Caddy Fee THB700

Until 15th November

Mae Jo

Green Fee:THB Caddy Fee: THB Golf Cart: THB

North Hill Chiangmai (Mezzanine)

Green Fee: THB Caddy Fee: THBGolf Cart: THB

Royal Chiangmai

Green Fee:THB  Caddy Fee: THB Golf Cart:THB

Stardome

Green Fee: THB  Caddy Fee:THB  Inc:THB

Low Season Prices

Lower Season Prices – Thai Residents

Alpine 

 THB2600 Green Fee,Caddy Fee,Golf Cart.

The ex home of The Chiang Mai Golf Classic

(Very poor value)

Gassan Legacy ( Formerly Lake City)

Green Fee,Caddy Fee, Golf Cart  THB1500 

Tue/Wed/Thurs THB1300 Inc Green Fee ,Caddy Fee,Golf Cart

OK

Gassan Marina

 CLOSED

Gold Canyon

GreenFee,Caddy Fee (Walking) THB800

OK

Green Fee, Caddy Fee,Cart: THB1000

Green Valley 

Green Fee:THB1800  Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart:THB700

Highland

Green Fee:THB1900 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

Inthanon

Daily THB1000 Green Fee Golf Cart Caddy Fee

(Subject to 2 people sharing one cart)

Mae Jo

Green Fee:THB1700 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

North Hill Chiangmai (Mezzanine)

Green Fee: THB1700 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

Royal Chiangmai

Green Fee:THB1920  Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart:THB700

Stardome

Green Fee: THB800  Caddy Fee:THB300  Inc:THB1600

High Season Prices – Thai Residents

High Season Prices – Thai Residents

Alpine 

Green Fee: THB2000 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart:THB700

The home of The Chiang Mai Golf Classic

OK

Gassan Legacy ( Formerly Lake City)

Green Fee: THB2500 (Sat/Sun THB3000), Caddy Fee:THB300,

Golf Cart:THB600

NOT

Gold Canyon

November Only:

GreenFee: THB900 Caddy Fee:THB300  GolfCart:THB700

From December -Fully booked!

Green Valley 

Green Fee:THB1800  Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart:THB700

Highland

Green Fee:THB1900 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

Inthanon

November Only

Green Fee:/ Caddy Fee:/ Golf Cart THB1500!

December onwards:

Green Fee: THB1300 After 1pm THB800 Caddy Fee:THB300 Golf Cart: THB600 

OK

Mae Jo

Green Fee:THB1700 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

North Hill Chiangmai (Mezzanine)

Green Fee: THB1700 Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart: THB700

NOT

Royal Chiangmai

Green Fee:THB1920  Caddy Fee: THB300 Golf Cart:THB700

Stardome

Green Fee: THB800  Caddy Fee:THB300  Inc:THB1600

 

Very simply the only value for the top courses for Thai residents is Inthanon by a country mile with THB1500 Inclusive Green Fee/Caddy Fee & Golf Cart for the remainder of November.

And not too bad for December onward. 

 

The joke is North Hill Chiangmai (Mezzanine), why would anyone want to play there, especially at those prices for a converted 9 hole course?

Chiangmai Golf Courses-High Season Prices.

High season upon us again.Below is a list of prices for Thai residents playing weekdays and walking.

Call each course for weekend,cart prices etc. All fees in Thai Baht,18 holes.

 

 

Course                               Green fee             Caddy fee

Alpine                                   1600                     300

Gold Canyon                        600                      250

Green Valley                        1800                    250

Highland                               1800                    300

Inthanon                               1300                    300

Koolpunt                               1000                     200

Lake City                                TBA

Lanna (Sports day)             500                      200 (Monday & Friday)

Stardome                              800                      250

Marina                                   1200                    300

Gymkhana                             300                     200

Sand Creek                           120                     100

 

:THANK-YOU:

 

Maejo                                    2500                    300

Royal Chiangmai                2400                     300

:Thinking:

These two suck,make sure you  don’t support them in the low season, or anytime!